We all know that successful long-term advisor client relationships are built on trust. The question is ... are we as advisors trustworthy?

There are many levels and dimensions of trust and it can be examined and discussed in many ways. Trust is not just about character, it can simply be about how we act or come across to another person. In the same setting with the same actions, one person may trust you and another may not. So to develop trust with different people you will need to adapt your behavior to meet them on their terms.

In our work of mentoring people based on behavioral styles we teach that for a client (or any person for that matter) to trust you, then the FIRST STEP is for you to trust yourself. Trusting yourself will free you to trust others and the environment is then set for them to trust you. Of course some clients (and advisors) will be naturally low in trust because of how they are "hard-wired". So even though you are trusting, your client may not be. Nevertheless, having a heightened self-awareness of all of the dimensions of who you are and who the client is will help in the building of trust.

To be blunt, if a client does not completely trust you then first look at your own behavior. A large part of our Wealth Mentor training and our Quality Life Programs are about self-discovery to develop greater trust in yourself, your relationships and your decisions.

Recently, State Street Advisors sponsored a very powerful research article prepared by Wharton University: "Bridging the Trust Divide: The Advisor Client Relationship". Every financial advisor (and even investors) should read it.

The article focuses on what is needed to build trust and then importantly what damages trust, although it does not address trust completely in the same way I have above. However, our beliefs are the same and the point of trusting yourself to build client trust fits in well. This article says that trust can be developed with: demonstrating competence, character and empathy. Empathy is definitely related to knowing who you are and then how to recognize the feelings of others and relate to them. Often competence and character are what get an advisor a meeting, but the relationship is lost because of "behavior", i.e. the empathy is not there.

The article points out very strongly that trust is damaged in the fee discussion, or the lack thereof. The whole issue of fee transparency is a major factor in the loss of trust. Why do advisors get fuzzy about fees? Because they are concerned about their ability to communicate the value of what they deliver. When you work through all the layers, it often comes back to the advisor not trusting themselves and the value they provide. Further, if all you are perceived to be delivering is a portfolio of managed funds that mark the market, then what is the value?

The industry is de-commoditizing fast. To win in the climate of de-commoditization will mean delivering value for what is charged and differentiating the service.

Advisors will have to learn how to work with the client at all levels of their lives and not just their money. This is what I call "Quality Life Planning". Yes, this approach is going further than traditional product based planning. What it will mean is that the advisor will have to know more about themselves, be confident in who they are and through this believe in the wisdom they have to offer.

One of the messages I have learned is that we all have a story to tell. Believe in the power of your own story and communicate it. This is where the wisdom comes from and is what will set you up to be a great mentor to others, not just their advisor.